Blog Posts

Hi everyone and welcome back to our Blog.  I want to spend a few minutes talking about staying positive and avoiding becoming discouraged.  

For a lot of people, it can be very challenging to stay positive.  This world can be cruel, unforgiving at times and seem to be overwhelming.  This time of year also brings a little bit of what some refer to as “seasonal depression.”  The holiday season can also bring with it some upsetting memories or bad reminders of the past.  Having said that, is there something we can do to help us stay positive?  Do we have any control to avoid becoming discouraged?  Perhaps we do.

Quite often discouragement comes when we feel a need of ours is not being met.  Or, how about when we are not seeing the “silver lining” in something we feel isn’t going our way?  Or, maybe we are exhausted and have a medical problem that is causing us some difficulty in treating or getting under control.  Perhaps you are looking at the world and wondering when it is going to end, the endless wars happening around us, the riots taking place in our neighborhoods or perhaps finding it more challenging to pay the bills in these hard economic times.  

Let me ask you a few questions.  Do you believe the word is inherently bad or negative?  Or, on the other hand, do you think we assign a negative thought or belief to things going on around you?  Do you feel you are just a victim of your circumstances and no matter what it is “bad” or discouraging?
In other words, do you believe we have the power in your mind to look at the “bright side” of things and find joy and positivity?  

I believe we can turn heartache and tragedy into something positive.  I am not saying this is easy to do, but I do believe it is possible.  Here are some suggestions that I have used and things I suggest to clients I work with.

1. Engage in Positive Self-Talk:  Our negative self talk can get in the way!  I would suggest PURPOSELY talking (out loud if possible) to yourself and finding something positive to say.  This not only includes being positive about the situation, but also about yourself.  For example, “I know this sucks, but I am able to manage this and be okay.”

2. Practice Gratitude:  Each day, find 3-5 things you are grateful for.  If possible, share these gratitudes with someone.  Also, it is a good idea to write them down in a gratitude journal.  This allows you to review things from previous days that may help you remember things that are positive.

3.  Spend time with Positive People:  It is true…if we surround ourselves with positive people not only do we begin to not only think positively but feel it as well.

4.  Laugh More:  Laughter is usually a good cure for feeling down, depressed or discouraged.  Find a funny movie, a comedy, or perhaps a funny comedian to listen to.  Or, spend time with a good friend and laugh!

5.  Treat Yourself Wisely:  Often, I hear others taking care of everyone around them and sometimes failing to do self-care.  It is just as important to take care of yourself.  This can be with exercise, a good diet, finding “me” time to relax, having a hobby, etc.

6.  Look to the Future:  Sometimes, we often are so burdened with the current moment that we fail to see the end results.  The situation will change and there is a tomorrow.

Give these things a try!  Remember, you have more control than you think you do!

Aaron Nicolaides, PhD, LCSW

Therapeuo Health – “Tackling Physical and Emotional Pain.”